Limiting extreme loads at session servers

A method, system and computer program product for limiting extreme loads and reducing fluctuations in load at session servers. An admission rate controller of a SIP router calculates the "deflator ratio" equal to the average number of in-dialog messages received over a first fixed interval of time divided by the average number of out-of-dialog messages received over a second fixed interval of time. Further, the admission rate controller calculates the "dampening ratio" equal to the maximum number of messages allowed over a period of time divided by the number of messages admitted over a previous time interval. When an overload condition has been detected, the admission rate controller calculates the maximum number of out-of-dialog messages to be sent to its associated SIP server based on the deflator and dampening ratios. In this manner, a smoother transition from the overload condition to the non-overload condition may occur.