Hidden Eating Disorders: Attachment and Affect Regulation in the Therapeutic Relationship

From the time I began working at a clinic that specialized in therapy with individuals with eating disorders, I have repeatedly encountered cases of clients hiding these symptoms from their therapists. When they finally do reveal the disorder, their therapists often worry that their clients are more disturbed than they thought and that, they, the therapists, did something wrong in the therapy. Although some therapeutic rupture can be part of the picture, I have found that these disclosures often reflect a client’s growing trust in the therapist’s presence and ability to help with feelings that have been, until now, dealt with through the eating behaviors themselves. In my attempts to understand what happens before and after an individual shares a hidden eating disorder with a therapist, I have found ideas from attachment theory, in particular those that explore links between attachment, affect regulation, and self-reflection, to be very helpful. Many authors have noted that eating disorders are related to problems with attachment, loss and separation, and affect regulation. Difficulties in these areas make it hard for clients to be self-reflective or use insight productively. In this article, I discuss my experience with the integration of these dynamics, which I have found to be key to successful psychotherapy with clients who hide their eating disorders.