Advising as Inviting to Trust

One feels it is not enough just to State one's opinion; one tries at the same time to frame it in a way that does not disconcert the other person, but helps him; one is holding the truth up for him, yes, but in such a way that he can slip into it. — Max Frisch, Sketchbook, 1946 Advising is sometimes just inviting someone to act on a reason he already has: giving him strategically useful information, encouraging his flagging spirits, making vivid what he wishes to forget. In that case no reasons are given. Sometimes, too, you find that your interlocutor has, as you'll put it, ‘no reason to do’ what you think he should do. You find you need to ‘give him’ a reason to do it. Here you have a choice between two strategies. You can attempt to influence him in a way that's at odds with the form of address distinctive of reasoning with him.