When Sugar is no Longer Sweet: The Discourse of Regret in Sugar Relationships Among Female Youth in Nigeria

The exchange of money and gifts for sexual services between older male patrons and younger female actors is a prevalent social practice which has its concomitant challenges and tales of woes. This article explores the discourse of regret in sugar or transactional relationships from the nuanced narratives and experiences of female youth in Calabar metropolis, Cross River State, South-eastern Nigeria. The study gains insights from the psychological theory of regret which describes regret as an aspect of social emotion that expresses dissatisfaction as a proof of one’s conviction of a past mistake. Drawing on ethnographic qualitative data sourced from semi-structured interviews and informal conversations with twenty female and ten male participants who have respectively been practitioners and patrons of transactional sex in the past five years, the study identifies failed promises, concurrent sexual partnership, sexual exploitation, dominance, and health challenges as predominant themes that emerge in female participants’ discourses of regret in sugar relationships. Based on our sampled population, we conclude that sugar relationships are exploitative engagements, and recommend intervention priorities like sexuality education and employment creation for young women to empower them economically and reduce their dependence on men.