Understanding Parental Gatekeeping in Families with a Special Needs Child

Supporting the positive development of a special needs child is especially challenging when parents have separated or divorced. Invariably, there is an increased need for collaborative co‐parenting wherein information is shared and intervention plans can be implemented effectively. In this article, the evolving literature on parental gatekeeping is applied to families with special needs children, as it offers a useful model for understanding the strengths and liabilities of co‐parenting relationships. We describe some of the typical and unique gatekeeping dynamics that occur when children suffer from developmental, physical, and/or psychiatric syndromes that require specific treatment and specialized parenting skills. Examples of both restrictive and facilitative gatekeeping are described as they manifest in these families. Implications for decision making are also discussed. Key Points for Family Court Community: Understand the unique demands of separated and divorced families who have a special needs child Given the syndrome present, as well as the severity of the condition, understand what is required of parents in terms of cooperation and collaboration Typical developmentally based parenting plans may not apply to a family with a special needs child Be aware of how parents handle safety and basic welfare issues of the child Understand each parent's approach to including versus restricting the other parent's access to information about the child, as well as their physical access to the child Understand the unique ways that subtle alienation and enmeshment may manifest in families with a special needs child Because many timely decisions need to be made by these families, the presumption of joint legal decision making across the board may not be practical or effective