Jefferson in Washington: Domesticating Manners in the Republican Court

Sir, THAT women greatly influence the habits and manners of men the history of most civilized nations, as well as our own experience, will sufficiently prove; nay that they often give impressions which continue during life, the observations of every unprejudiced observer will equally substantiate-It will not be denied that an intercourse with our sex polishes the manners, and gives a delicacy to the minds of men; if such is their influence, I am not wrong in supposing that they are capable, and very often give a cast to our political complexion-The superior light in which you have been accustomed to view yourselves, may make this opinion of difficult admission; but on reflection it will be found, that the secret power which we have over you, enables us to fashion you lords of the creation as we please-It is scarcely necessary to resort to times past to prove my position; the history of France will furnish ample testimony in my favour, not only that women have fashioned, but that they have actually governed men. " "An impossibility," exclaimed the gentleman!-The fact was, that the uniform good nature, kindness of disposition, frank, gay, cordial manners of this lady, had softened the asperity of party feeling, disarmed prejudice, conciliated general good will, and won a popularity (I mean a social, not a political popularity) for her husband, which his cold and reserved manners never could have done.