Excessive Loquacity: Women's Speech as Represented in American Etiquette Books

This paper examines etiquette books as repositories of cultural beliefs about the differing ways men and women should talk and the beliefs about the differing ways men and women actually talk. Etiquette books published in the past 150 years are examined to measure consistency or change in these beliefs, and the implications of the study for actual conversations between men and women are briefly discussed. Some of the conclusions reached by this study are that according to etiquette books women should not gossip but men can; men should not discuss politics in the company of women; women are advised to talk little but smile a lot; men are sometimes advised not to yell, but women at all times should be serene; while men are advised not to use too much slang, women should never use slang; and swearing or profanity should not be practiced by either sex but especially not by women or by men in the company of women. It is concluded that etiquette rules have changed little over the years and that these rules do have an impact on our speech behavior. (TS)