Why did God let this Happen? Assessing the Spiritual Impacts of Sexual Addiction on Intimate Female Partners: A Qualitative Investigation

Recent years have seen a rise in research on sexual addiction (SA) and compulsive sexual behaviour (CSB). In the literature, these concepts describe an emerging field of study that may encompass a range of interpersonal and communal consequences for concerned individuals, their intimate partners, families, and society. Taboos surrounding SA/CSB often shroud the subject in shame and ignorance. Despite growing scholarly interest in SA/CSB, few studies have analysed intimate partners’ lived experiences in depth, and no other research has investigated the spiritual impacts of SA/CSB on intimate partners. This descriptive phenomenological study addresses this knowledge gap. In-depth semi-structured interviews were conducted with female partners (primary participants; n = 12) and professional counsellors (supplementary participants; n = 15). The analysis reveals that following discovery/disclosure, SA/CSB may affect women via complex and multifaceted spiritual consequences. Significantly, most women did not receive validation or safety from their faith communities. Instead, many reported experiencing a range of spiritual impacts, including changes in their faith, fear of stigmatization, the perception of pastoral pressure to ‘forgive and forget’, ostracism from their faith communities, and/or a sense of anger directed towards God as the perceived silent co-conspirator who permitted the deception to continue undiscovered, sometimes over years or even decades. The study’s findings point to salient opportunities for faith communities to provide more targeted support and assistance during healing and recovery.